By Mitzi Loera
"It can't happen to me. It doesn't mean everyone knows about domestic violence and these types of situations actually do happen and they happen very close to home."
Anna Bernal with the crisis center says the thought of it never happening in your own family is typical in domestic violence situations.
"It didn't have to happen."
Kathy Ortiz never imagined she would get the call saying her granddaughter was dead
Ortiz's granddaughter Delyza lived 500 miles away in Houston and she rarely got to speak to her granddaughter, because of her daughter's very controlling boyfriend.
"He wouldn't even let them call us, he'd monitor the calls, he was so controlling threatening to kill her she was just so scared my daughter," Ortiz said.
"Women lose their identity when they are in an abusive situation, a lot of times you know the women think they can't make it on their own. They want to do everything in their power to stay in the relationship not thinking of the effects in the long term its going to have on the children," Bernal said.
Bernal says if you are involved in an abusive situation, you need to have a safety plan. This will help you prepare when its time to leave an abuser.
"A safety plan consists of taking you know documents clothing important things you need for that opportunity and chance comes for you to leave you can just get up and go because you've already followed the process," Bernal said.
And getting out of an abusive relationship can be easier said than done.
"Unless you are a victim of domestic violence it is very unfair to say its partly her fault she should have done this and she should have done that, but you know what you don't know the situation and as long as you don't know the situation it is very unfair to put blame on her, because you don't know what kind of life she was living through," Bernal said.
Bernal adds, if you or someone you know are battling domestic violence the Crisis Center is there to help.
They can help with shelter, or help you put together a safety plan, call the Crisis Center at 333-2527.